Monday, February 7, 2011

$30.01 reasons why I'm a writer...

Reason $30.01 - That's how much I have left to my name. A penny over thirty bucks to be exact. It seems there were complications with my unemployment claim forms that has caused EDD to cancel my claim, pending an appeal. I'm optimistic though, considering there was only an error on my forms that was my fault and I'm hoping this will get cleared up soon, so I'm not too worried about having thirty bucks left to my name, but it does kinda suck. I don't even want to imagine how I might feel if somehow my claim gets canceled outright and I have to scramble to find a job quicker than I expected. I've been applying for jobs here and there, but if my claim gets officially canceled, life is going to suck:(

Anyway, there is some good news to report. There has been a dramatic shift. The great 1st Act has come to a conclusion and the 2nd act is about to begin. I changed the screenplay I'm working on. I was starting to put work into my hilarious comedy that was going to take the world by storm, but I kept feeling an urge for my other story. My hardcore, drama infested story that keeps eating away at me in my brain. And for the .5 of you who will actually read this blog one day when I'm famous enough to warrant a Google search, you'll come to know that this story is very personal to me. Not only is the main character broke and has money problems like me, he also frolics around in Vegas... like I once did on a short term gig at the 2009 World Series of Poker. My gritty Vegas drama. Oh how I love thee. But I can officially say... I'm writing!!!!

I don't know what it is about this story, but it has me thinking of it nonstop 24/7. I EXCITEDLY open my story notes and screenwriting program everyday now with a fuel of energy and purpose. This is what I'm supposed to be writing. I got through a 1st Act treatment of mine, wrote a new opening to the story and I'm just starting to comb through each page of my previous 60 page workload, rewriting it from page one.

I can't explain what has gotten into me lately, but I do know that I love it and don't want it to go away. It is torture, though. I feel it in my bones when I write. It literally hurts my brain to think creatively and write new scenes, but this time around... I push through the pain and get it done.

Lately, every movie and TV show I watch I'm constantly going over the story, characters, plot points and themes. Of course, I've done this thousands of times, as writers usually do this with everything they watch, however this time it feels a bit new and different. More real. More accurate. With everything that I watch now, I put myself in the scenes themselves. Inside the character's shoes. It feels like I'm their world and I LOVE it. I think this is what it feels like to be a good screenwriter. I'm starting to notice the small things in a film or show that makes them unique and different. I see it now. I understand more about writing a spec than ever before. The passion is back. The passion I've been missing for six years.

I never thought like this years ago when I was writing as a young buck at 21, so perhaps age has finally matured me. I've matured enough to hopefully write a decent spec. The goal is to turn all of this new found knowledge and insight into a solid first draft. I know it's going to be a tough spec to write given the subject matter in Sin City, but I have the will and desire to get it done... even though I have thirty dollars to my name and a dream in my mind.

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